I’m scared.

What if I do it wrong? What if no one reads it? What if I mess up some way and everyone hates me? What if I can’t work out that back end techy stuff and it looks crap?

For all these reasons and more, I don’t have my own blog, but I love writing reviews and have done for a few companies as well as guest reviews on a number of blogs.

I’ve always wanted to be more involved in the community so when I heard about #LubeAndALaptop in Birmingham I had to go. But the same old anxieties were there. Was I good enough? Did I belong? I’m not really a blogger….

I absolutely needn’t have worried. From the lovely Joanne Gemini bounding over to me like an excited puppy in New Street Station, to Patrick of Latex, Leather and Lace bundling me into the back of a van then taking me on a tour of dodgy sex shops (jelly dongs everywhere *shudders*) I felt so welcomed and so at home.

I met so many amazing people, so I’m sorry I can’t mention them all! But some of the highlights for me were:

The lovely Cheryl, of Horny Geek Girl, who gave me some much need reassurance that hosting my own blog wasn’t the be all and end all.

Echo Explores was so friendly, I loved getting to know them and Chris – even though it felt slightly voyeuristic given how many intimate details of their relationship I’d read!

Kinky Kitten Kim was just as adorable in real life as I find her on twitter.

I didn’t get to read Little Spoon’s blog before she stopped writing but she and her Big Spoon gave me interesting insights into burlesque, vintage and kink. They are truly an amazing couple.

Emmeline Peaches held a writer’s corner offering hints and tips to fledgling bloggers and the experienced alike. Although I must confess I was a bit too overwhelmed by that stage to take much in.

I had a bit of a fan girl moment when Girl on the Net arrived, I have her book on my kindle!

The Blog Swap was an amazing idea. I got to swap some body safe and fully sterilisable toys that didn’t quite work for me for others from my lust list. This is a fab way for bloggers to build content and something I’ve continued with a selected few of my blogging friends.

I wasn’t expecting anything more than that from the meet up. Just chatting to other reviewers and bloggers, and having a few drinks but Patrick came through with a huge selection of goodie bags. Mine was stuffed with Skyns condoms, lubes, a Fun Factory mug and lanyard, Fever striped holdups, pens and an extra kinky gift of handcuffs from Rouge Garments.

None of the bloggers I met made me feel like I shouldn’t be there or that I wasn’t a proper blogger. I got the train home exhausted and exhilarated, maybe I can be part of this community after all.